Commitment to Clarity…The Uncomfortable Truth….

bethechangeI will never forget the moment that my “push through it and it will all be ok…” button stopped working…I was sitting in the middle of my massive living room, in my massive way too expensive four story town home, my entire life strewn in piles across the floor amid REI bags and yuppy hiking clothes with the tags still connected….It was 4 hours before I was supposed to leave for my 10 day trip to Bali by myself…and I could not find my passport, I had not finished packing, and I still had important emails to respond to on my work lap top…

There was a moment where I could almost see myself from above crying amid the rubble that was my beautiful and very expensive life and all I could think was “oh honey…how did we let this happen…?”.

I am only now (close to 9 months later) recovering from where I was on that cold December morning…As I start to come back I am also starting to understand how and more importantly why I got there…

While there are always multiple contributors to life’s greatest and darkest moments I am starting to understand some of the fundamental mis-steps I took and through that process and I am making new commitments to myself as a result of what I am learning.  I want to share these with all of you beautiful people that take the time to read this post as I would love to hear your reflections on these areas, thoughts, etc. so that hopefully together we can in some way help each other “do life” a little bit better with more joy and less struggle….

With that here are my 5 Steps to Doing Life Better Today Than I Did Yesterday…please let me know what you think!

Step One – Dream in 5D

I am a huge believer in the power of visualization and in the importance of knowing what you want to get what you want. This construct has served me very well in many ways.   However, I realized that often we think about what we want as somewhat one dimensional goals ie “get promoted”, “buy a house”, etc.  our vision for success often comes to us as visions of the instagram pictures our future self will post…the beautiful vacations, smiling families, beautiful houses, etc.  however, we rarely really spend time thinking about how the people behind the beautiful pictures feel everyday, what types of things and who will occupy our time, what our energy level will be like, what we will say no to so that we can say yes to the things that will get us there, etc.  So I am newly committed to dreaming in 5D and making sure that I have a clear vision for what how the future me in my vision of success is feeling, thinking, contributing, etc. and what she is Doing, Deciding, Declining, Delegating, and Donating to get there.

Step Two – Manage Energy – Align Time and Money Accordingly

I am just starting to really understand the value of this but there is true power in knowing what fills you up and what drains you…then the trick is delegate or eliminate what takes the wind out of your sails based on if it is necessary or needed and plan to do the things that fill you with life as much as possible…when we are full of life is when we are most well positioned to do our best work and make our best contributions to the world…this includes being aware of how space, clutter, etc. impacts you…if you find yourself deflated every time that you pull into the garage because there is junk everywhere…don’t just settle handle it…if you have to have a company come and haul everything away…the energy and life that you get from having a clear space will bring you back ten fold the money it would cost to buy everything again if you accidentally got rid of anything you “needed” but chances are you wont miss a thing….

Step Three – Go Within, Go Without, Just “Go”…

My first year in my current role I spent over 8 thousand dollars of my personal money on books, how you might ask…well easily…As I went from addressing 100K issues of my local office to opening the hood of our multibillion dollar operation, I felt a huge responsibility to stay up all night and not do anything unless I did enough research to ensure that what I was doing was in fact the “best” solution, action, etc. while in some ways this was a good thing and I am grateful for it because I learned a ton…I also learned that often the best solution is the most simple solution that often can be found somewhere in the solutions that are already out there but not being used…I have since found that this principle is pretty true almost everywhere for example weight loss…there is a billion dollar weight loss and diet industry based on the fact that while almost everyone knows that to lose weight you need to eat right, get enough sleep, and exercise it is easier to go buy $200 of weight loss supplements then it is to look in the mirror and really ask yourself why you can find 2 hours a night to watch TV but can’t carve out 30 consistent minutes a day to exercise….I have found the model below to be very helpful in facing myself on many of these items…

Go Within: Ask yourself where do you want to go?  take an objective assessment of where you are now, then in comparing the to map out how you will get there…in the “how” portion list everything that already exists that you just aren’t using…

Go Without: Commit to trying to go from where you are to where you want to be only using what already exists/what you already have for 30 days.  After that you will either have data to support that the other tools don’t work, you need something else etc. or you will be closer to your goals and a new habit will be formed.

Just Go: The most important thing of all most of the time is to just take action, make the decision, whatever it is commit and move accordingly.  I think as humans we paralyze ourselves trying to make decisions.  We google a restaurant that we want to go to, then in the time that we google metro maps, bus schedules, or parking options to get there we could have walked to our destination.  I’m not saying it’s bad to be well informed but use your brain power wisely…spend time on life’s important decisions but be ok with not taking the best way as long as it gets you there with everything else…you will be in motion and you just might enjoy the journey  “Major in the majors and minor in the minors”

Step Four: Focus on the result “the fruit” of your efforts

Evaluate if you are getting the results you want or not out of your efforts.  If not then spend a little time thinking about what else you can do to get a different result…if it’s reasonable do it…once you have ruled out all the reasonable ways that you can grow to get a different result than what you are getting than be ready to evaluate if the things you are investing your time and attention into are the right things to produce the fruit you are looking for…if they aren’t it’s time to make some hard decisions…but don’t spend all of your time taking care of a lemon tree and waiting for apples…

Step Five: Enjoy

Living a life you love does not come by accident…In fact it is hard work, a lot of hard decisions, painful conversations, relationships lost, feelings hurt (yours and other peoples), nights spent up making sure you go through various areas of your home to get rid of those things that you don’t love or use anymore, lots of hard looks at yourself and how your impacting the people that you love…but there is also nothing as rewarding as living an intentional life, enjoy every moment and share it with as many people as you can….

In the words of the amazing Lou Holtz “I Can’t Believe that God put us on this earth to be ordinary…”.  Don’t let comfort get in the way of your extraordinary….instead choose greatness and know that when you feel the pain of a day fully spent that the pain in fact means that you are growing…

Thank you for reading and for joining me on this journey…


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